My mirror is blank
I can't see my reflection
Ignorance is bliss
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Saturday, April 16, 2011
The Skinny
Ok so, I'm totally back, sort of. I mean, I just relocated and I have been trying to figure out life in a new place. It's interesting. I mean, I've never lived away from my family, and here I am, in a place where I know very few people. I'm not sure what I have to say yet, but I just wanted you all to know that my neglect was not intentional. It's a lot of work moving a family from one place to another. Blogging just hasn't been on my mind.
But I'm back!
But I'm back!
Friday, March 11, 2011
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
365 Art
Day 33
Dont.Touch.Her.
Dont.Touch.Her.
Sometimes words aren’t enough
So I paint vivid pictures
Simple enough for the layman
Yet
Sufficient for the genius
But…
With words of course
I never learned how to use an easel properly
So I [speak] in frames
She said, “he’s a good man, with good intentions”
But I know better
You see
I’ve read letters
And listened when I appeared in other realms
My heart merely beat as it should have
So
I know that [you’re] scared
And aware
Because It’s in your eyes
And no matter how tough an adolescent you were
It’s enough
Everyone faces fright when surrounded with tumult
Just obliterate the pretense of strength
Courage is needed even when giving up
Let’s make-believe
I’ll make you believe me when I say that you’re lost
I have looked deep enough
Your core has transformed from vibrant to crushed
Flush consuming your skin-tone
You are dying in front of me
And, all I can do is wonder
If [I] slap you with enough force
Will you wake up?
Monday, February 28, 2011
To my mother...
Bittersweet memories
Ummi,
I never told you this, but I felt it was time now.
I am almost 6 months away from turning 29, and now have 2 children of my own, and I can honestly say, I understand what you did and why you did it. That doesn't mean I agree with every part of it, or that I want to mirror your example as a mother myself in it's entirety, but...
I respect you.
My respect for you and your hard work has increased so much in the last few months that I had to write it down. Late nights, 8 of us, poverty, a Da'ee for a husband, and no help most of the time.
I respect you.
A proud, never complaining, always pleasant, loving in so many ways, great friend to all, exemplary Muslim woman, and content housewife.
I respect you.
Never did you ask Abi for anything that wasn't given. He didn't stress. You trusted him in the hardest of situations, you instilled belief in us that everything would be handled by Allah, and it was. At times we weren't the best of children, and many of us disappointed you...again...at times. But you continued to smile, and pray.
I respect you.
I feel a connection to you that I hope never withers. I was breech in your tummy. My daughter was breech in my tummy. I was diagnosed with Bronchitis at 3 months old and was in the emergency room on oxygen. My daughter was diagnosed at 3 months old with Bronchitis and had to get an Albuterol treatment. I turned over right before birth, she too turned over right before birth. Our connection can never be denied. When you use to tell me the story of your pregnancy with me, my stomach would turn, thinking about the concern and stress of you having to face such hard situations. Now I, the same child that listened to those stories about me, have gone through it all and more.
I respect you.
And after all of these years, your youngest is 26, and you're still just as concerned and involved as you were preadolescence.
I want to kiss your feet, rub your hands, and hold your heart so that it feels my adoration for your every effort to rear us to the best of your ability. I won't say you deserve the world because you don't. In my opinion you have earned something far greater. You deserve Allah, and I pray that He allows you exactly that.
Ummi, I love and respect you endlessly. Thank you for being exactly who you are. For that,
I.Respect.You
Upside-Down-Girl-
Ummi,
I never told you this, but I felt it was time now.
I am almost 6 months away from turning 29, and now have 2 children of my own, and I can honestly say, I understand what you did and why you did it. That doesn't mean I agree with every part of it, or that I want to mirror your example as a mother myself in it's entirety, but...
I respect you.
My respect for you and your hard work has increased so much in the last few months that I had to write it down. Late nights, 8 of us, poverty, a Da'ee for a husband, and no help most of the time.
I respect you.
A proud, never complaining, always pleasant, loving in so many ways, great friend to all, exemplary Muslim woman, and content housewife.
I respect you.
Never did you ask Abi for anything that wasn't given. He didn't stress. You trusted him in the hardest of situations, you instilled belief in us that everything would be handled by Allah, and it was. At times we weren't the best of children, and many of us disappointed you...again...at times. But you continued to smile, and pray.
I respect you.
I feel a connection to you that I hope never withers. I was breech in your tummy. My daughter was breech in my tummy. I was diagnosed with Bronchitis at 3 months old and was in the emergency room on oxygen. My daughter was diagnosed at 3 months old with Bronchitis and had to get an Albuterol treatment. I turned over right before birth, she too turned over right before birth. Our connection can never be denied. When you use to tell me the story of your pregnancy with me, my stomach would turn, thinking about the concern and stress of you having to face such hard situations. Now I, the same child that listened to those stories about me, have gone through it all and more.
I respect you.
And after all of these years, your youngest is 26, and you're still just as concerned and involved as you were preadolescence.
I want to kiss your feet, rub your hands, and hold your heart so that it feels my adoration for your every effort to rear us to the best of your ability. I won't say you deserve the world because you don't. In my opinion you have earned something far greater. You deserve Allah, and I pray that He allows you exactly that.
Ummi, I love and respect you endlessly. Thank you for being exactly who you are. For that,
I.Respect.You
Upside-Down-Girl-
365 Art
Day32
FreeWrite
I have been through this dark road many times, not knowing when the light would grace me again. Or if it would. I can't hold my breath, for it never may come. I may live black and blue until my last breath...and if I do, let me rise to the rays of reward. My heart hurts too much. It feels too strongly. And at times, I want to throw growth a fist, and struggle into the ocean.
Just let me see light again...
FreeWrite
I have been through this dark road many times, not knowing when the light would grace me again. Or if it would. I can't hold my breath, for it never may come. I may live black and blue until my last breath...and if I do, let me rise to the rays of reward. My heart hurts too much. It feels too strongly. And at times, I want to throw growth a fist, and struggle into the ocean.
Just let me see light again...
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
365 Art
Day 31
FreeWrite
I, am a lover of Love.
Only in the esotericism of words lost in light,
could I communicate with what inheres above.
White doves fly round this earth showing proof of You.
You it is who has captured my heart,
leaving all other things jealous of Your presence.
My love too strong to share, I want You to myself.
Selfless without You, selfish with You.
Make me a friend of Yours, a believer,
like Ibrahim, a patient knowledge seeker.
I, am a lover of Love.
Thursday, February 3, 2011
365 Art
Day 27
WordPlay in A Lovers Nest
Love keep loving me, please.
Pleas, plead for what is closest your hearts desire,
I'm in dire need of you.
Diaries written on sheets for you.
Palms secrete sweat beads through glands,
Our land of love lingers in the hearts of latent lovers
But for others this emotion too potent, too open.
Can you promise to love me forever?
I'll whisper honey-rich poetic hymns,
Sing songs in your honor lest you fear these words in vain.
In sane, in veins, untamed, Only God could have engraved
Your name on my heart.
Only in love like this does love get lost.
Light luring looks leaving me flushed...
This crush, much like that of a child
I blush.
Loving living in this moment,
I own it.
You inhabited my heart, healing hurt from decades before you.
And since love is all you have to give, let me borrow.
At last...
Silence my sorrows by morrow.
WordPlay in A Lovers Nest
Love keep loving me, please.
Pleas, plead for what is closest your hearts desire,
I'm in dire need of you.
Diaries written on sheets for you.
Palms secrete sweat beads through glands,
Our land of love lingers in the hearts of latent lovers
But for others this emotion too potent, too open.
Can you promise to love me forever?
I'll whisper honey-rich poetic hymns,
Sing songs in your honor lest you fear these words in vain.
In sane, in veins, untamed, Only God could have engraved
Your name on my heart.
Only in love like this does love get lost.
Light luring looks leaving me flushed...
This crush, much like that of a child
I blush.
Loving living in this moment,
I own it.
You inhabited my heart, healing hurt from decades before you.
And since love is all you have to give, let me borrow.
At last...
Silence my sorrows by morrow.
365 Art
Day 24
(Leaf Series)
For: Abi and Ummi
Since I couldn't paint your hearts gold...
It's the thought that counts (and the painting).
Thursday, January 27, 2011
365 Art
Day 23
(FreeWrite)
This mystery
Is a memory
Of love in my vicinity
Do you remember me?
Love, do you remember me?
(FreeWrite)
This mystery
Is a memory
Of love in my vicinity
Do you remember me?
Love, do you remember me?
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
365 Art
Day 22
(FreeWrite)
Pangs of separation let me know that in you I find solace
I promise
That there is nothing but love that resides within me
And although I know perfection we'll never meet
I impeach your intention.
So let the world over know where my heart lie.
and why...
I'm in love with you.
(FreeWrite)
Pangs of separation let me know that in you I find solace
I promise
That there is nothing but love that resides within me
And although I know perfection we'll never meet
I impeach your intention.
So let the world over know where my heart lie.
and why...
I'm in love with you.
365 Art
Day 21
(FreeWrite)
I'm proud to say...
That I love the love in me
Hate the hate in me
Emote graciously...
But I'm sometimes too forgiving
And I've tried to find the medium, though I have yet to
So I'm continually reliving
Trying to figure out where I fall short
Where and what did I abort...along the way
P.S. Never be afraid to speak your mind, no matter what the critics say.
(FreeWrite)
I'm proud to say...
That I love the love in me
Hate the hate in me
Emote graciously...
But I'm sometimes too forgiving
And I've tried to find the medium, though I have yet to
So I'm continually reliving
Trying to figure out where I fall short
Where and what did I abort...along the way
P.S. Never be afraid to speak your mind, no matter what the critics say.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
365 Art
Day 18
Words of wisdom
From me to you
Let God be your inspiration; He alone is enough.
Love be your motivation; When you are blessed with this, all else becomes manageable even during times of struggle.
Action be your dedication; No matter what surrounds you, positive perseverance will always prevail.
And faith be your separation; It is piety that will set you apart from the majority.
Words of wisdom
From me to you
Let God be your inspiration; He alone is enough.
Love be your motivation; When you are blessed with this, all else becomes manageable even during times of struggle.
Action be your dedication; No matter what surrounds you, positive perseverance will always prevail.
And faith be your separation; It is piety that will set you apart from the majority.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
365 Art
Day 16
(Inspired by Rumi)
Between each day falls night
Though, even in darkness you will find light
But only the lovers...
"Come...let's fall in love again"
(Inspired by Rumi)
Between each day falls night
Though, even in darkness you will find light
But only the lovers...
"Come...let's fall in love again"
365 Art
Day 15
(FreeWrite)
Hips shapely
Big, small, attitudinal, dainty
Hair tangled
Locs
Curls
Waves
Brown skin
Caramel complected
Dark chocolate tone
Perfect lips
Perfect kiss...er
Slim waist
No better place
High, low, in between cheekbones
With me, with she, with her, is your home
Magical fingers...she possesses
Mother, Sister, Aunt, Friend, and Lover
Don't you love her?
...Black Woman.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
365 Art
Day 13
Where Urban, elegance, and Modesty meet.
Skirt and Jewelry by: Ma'ti Designs.
Black under shirt and white T-shirt by: Firm Apparel.
Photo by: SLJ
Don't say you weren't informed...
365 Art
Day 12
Haiku
My heart remembers
That You are the One true God
Awake or Asleep
Ya Allah! Please keep me under Your watch always.
Haiku
My heart remembers
That You are the One true God
Awake or Asleep
Ya Allah! Please keep me under Your watch always.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
365 Art
Day 11
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Scarf/Hijab/Shawl and bracelet sets, on Ma'ti Designs table at the Eradicating Islamophobia Conference.
Beautiful and original. You should get you one. ;-)
365 Art
Day 10
Friday, January 14th, 2011
The Ma'ti Design earring display at the Eradicating Islamophobia Conference. It was good times, with good people.
365 Art
Day 9
Light Grey Crushed Velvet Abaya with triangular design on the front. Sewing has been in my family for 4 generations, and I am in the third. I hope my daughter joins the fourth.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Sunday, January 9, 2011
365 Art
Day 6
Haiku
My Beloved Messenger (Salallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam)
Like the moon gives light
You brighten the universe
Mercy to the world
365 Art
Day 5
You
Your walk is the sexiest thing about you
And what is a Queen without you?
Nothing
Cuz we belong together
You are the seeker of my treasure
My pleasure..
Is calling you my king
And Its your melody I sing
Because...
Between the bridge of each finger
Run nerves through which I feel your vibration
Your seed enables creation
And I can't close my eyes without hearing your voice
Deep, as it is
Soothing, is your kiss
Intense
Each word
Rhythmic
Each sentence
Scented with your cologne
My home
Is in your arms
And I could dwell therein forever
No harm
Just your love
Your calm
Your heart...beats
To my heart beat
My hips sway
To your feet
And we'd never walk alone
Cause your footsteps are my compass
And I love this
If I weren't your soul mate I'd be your mistress
Relentless
But...
Thank God for our unity
I'll be your wife, friend, lover, your girl
If I could multiply anything in this world...
It'd be my love for you
It'd be my trust in you
My crush on you
My lust for you
My all for you
Cause..
I just can't get enough of you
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Friday, January 7, 2011
Part 1
Untitled
And if I held my breath I'd probably go unconscious
From waiting on your shallow promise-s
I promise
I gave my life to you
My womb
My time
My rights to you
And you threw it back at me
Gladly
And never looked back
Like you were never happy
Like my hips never bore your children
My limbs didn't console your feelings
My prayers never gave you healin'
My heart didn't break from revealin'
For-real then
I give up on you
Cause you gave up on earth
AND your worth back when
And I won't search through history cuz statistically if you're not here now
Than it don't mean S*** to me
Needless to say
I probably wouldn't find you there anyway...
It's something I couldn't hold in after a conversation I had with a friend over the weekend about the state of the black man. It's not finished but this flew out.
And if I held my breath I'd probably go unconscious
From waiting on your shallow promise-s
I promise
I gave my life to you
My womb
My time
My rights to you
And you threw it back at me
Gladly
And never looked back
Like you were never happy
Like my hips never bore your children
My limbs didn't console your feelings
My prayers never gave you healin'
My heart didn't break from revealin'
For-real then
I give up on you
Cause you gave up on earth
AND your worth back when
And I won't search through history cuz statistically if you're not here now
Than it don't mean S*** to me
Needless to say
I probably wouldn't find you there anyway...
It's something I couldn't hold in after a conversation I had with a friend over the weekend about the state of the black man. It's not finished but this flew out.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
365 Art
Day 2
Poem: Sisterhood
If you can see me, then you should see yourself
Because…
Somewhere inside of me you reside
Unperfected
This bond neglected
A long time ago
I mean, we rarely see eye to eye anymore
And,
I miss your company
I miss the advice you use to give to me
When we would get together and share our stories
And even though we lost touch, you’re still in my memory
But honestly,
I’ve been meaning to tell you that I love you
For His sake
And nothing can top that
Because each morning it is by His Will that I awake
And I see myself in your face
And although we don’t hold hands anymore
You could never be replaced
So tell me
What happened to the sister I had in you?
How come we don’t have the friendship our mother’s use to?
And how come when you speak in my absence it’s usually untrue?
I mean
I thought we were sisters
I thought we’d paint pictures together
Read scriptures together
And be friends forever
But all I can say is that you left me hanging
Cuz jealousy got the best of you along the way and…
I’m ready to take back what the devil took from us
Say goodbye to the envy, lies, and mistrust
Cuz again,
For the love of Him I forgive you
And I’m not ashamed to say that I miss you
So until the day we can say...
That we love, hate, give, and take for Him
I’ll keep writing my feelings with this bleeding pen
Poem: Sisterhood
If you can see me, then you should see yourself
Because…
Somewhere inside of me you reside
Unperfected
This bond neglected
A long time ago
I mean, we rarely see eye to eye anymore
And,
I miss your company
I miss the advice you use to give to me
When we would get together and share our stories
And even though we lost touch, you’re still in my memory
But honestly,
I’ve been meaning to tell you that I love you
For His sake
And nothing can top that
Because each morning it is by His Will that I awake
And I see myself in your face
And although we don’t hold hands anymore
You could never be replaced
So tell me
What happened to the sister I had in you?
How come we don’t have the friendship our mother’s use to?
And how come when you speak in my absence it’s usually untrue?
I mean
I thought we were sisters
I thought we’d paint pictures together
Read scriptures together
And be friends forever
But all I can say is that you left me hanging
Cuz jealousy got the best of you along the way and…
I’m ready to take back what the devil took from us
Say goodbye to the envy, lies, and mistrust
Cuz again,
For the love of Him I forgive you
And I’m not ashamed to say that I miss you
So until the day we can say...
That we love, hate, give, and take for Him
I’ll keep writing my feelings with this bleeding pen
365 Art
So I went away, had a baby, and now I'm back for a challenge. My baby is almost three months old, and just as cute as can be. Praise God!
Well, yesterday Liza Garza (Def Jam Poet) posted this as a status:"the question isnt can you...but will you create a new piece of art every day for the next year?" And so along with quite a few other people, I'm joining in on this challenge. Since I'm an artist in many forms, it's time to really really challenge myself. And I love this idea. So, whether or not I can get to the computer the exact day I create something, I will post here every time I get a chance, If God so wills.
So, I started late, and today (Tuesday, January 4th, 2011) was my first day. I made a very simple skirt out of Grey Suede material, with a black embroidery design on it. It's a 4 panel A-line skirt that I recently have fallen in love with as a pattern. I'm sure I'll be making more of these during this challenge. Wish me, and my creative mind luck. I'll be back with you later on to post something else......
365 Art
BeeTrue
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